A casual afternoon in Kitsilano
Well, after all the years I’ve worked at the library I assumed that I had seen pretty much everything but of course that statement is never true and today I was again proven wrong.
It was a regular day, with the usual daily processes, the usual mundane little jobs, and the usual annoying people. One of our old favorites, a lady who has been gone for a long time and goes by the human name of Irene, has recently resurfaced much to our collective chagrin. This is one real specimen of a lady too. Picture a wiry, gaunt faced little troll of a person, with shoulder length brown bristle-pad hair sticking out from below an ever-present baseball cap. She also always wears large brown sunglasses that thankfully hide us from, if the saying is true, her soul. Her first words many years ago upon entering the library and approaching the information desk were: “I’m a New York Jew so don’t fuck with me.” Oddly enough, the Librarian on duty at the time had been expecting a “Hello” or “Good morning.” and was taken slightly aback. Some of her other exceptional moments included the times when she ate the paper checkout receipts (Well, she didn’t actually consume the receipt, rather she just put it in her mouth and chewed on it before spitting it out at us.) and the time she picked fights with almost everyone in the library, staff and customers. The whole neighbourhood knows her and not in a good way. She was banned a few years ago and chose to haunt somewhere else for a while. She’s been seen around for the last year and today she came in and began complaining within 30 seconds of her entrance. Not exactly a record for her but not too shabby either. She immediately set upon a nice lady who was unloading some boxes of books that she was donating to us. First she berated this lady for having the boxes on the floor in what Irene had decided was in the way, and then berated her some more for talking to the librarian and I while unloading the boxes. She then continued to heap the abuse on us for what she said was talking too loud. We all took it for the time being, hoping she would be placated and would shut the hell up. This worked and she stopped and sat down at a nearby table. Then the librarian said “Sorry” to the lady and Irene took offense to this, came over, and started again. “Why are you apologizing for someone else?” She said, and began to insult the woman again for talking while also arguing with the librarian for taking the woman’s side. I decided I had heard more than enough so I took the book truck full of donations and left. Irene retreated for a moment and then came back for another round. As I went into the workroom the librarian and her were going strong. I would like to note that at this point the disturbance she was creating was far louder than anything that was there before she arrived. This is what usually happens with her.
Why is it that people like this never get fatally hit by cars or contract a rare fatal disease? Or even just a common fatal disease? Hell, I’d even accept a small fatal slip in the bathtub…
Anyway, that’s not what I was going to talk about. I’m not even going to talk about the strange native Indian looking transvestite who comes in occasionally and giggles softly to herself while walking around in a glassy-eyed teeth-baring trance. Irene didn’t even notice her and she sat right beside her. What a great corner of the library that was.
What I wanted to share was the other interesting thing that happened. We’ve had incidences before: drunk guys in the library, psycho guys in the library, homeless guys having drinking parties in the back lane, people with road rage fighting it out in the alley, the jewelry store across the alley getting robbed, teens smoking pot outside the back door, etc. etc. But today we had a first since I’ve been around.
About two thirty in the afternoon there was some hubbub outside and I overheard some of my coworkers talking about “calling 911” because there was some kid getting beat up outside by some guys with a baseball bat. I was too busy to find out more at that moment but I got the full story later. Here’s what went down:
Apparently there were a couple of boys around 15-16 years old hanging out in the back parking lot when two bigger guys, wearing black pants, black shirts, black bandanas and black toques (It was pretty warm today so that should have been a bad sign right there.) came around the back corner of the library and approached the boys. One of the guys was carrying a baseball bat and they grabbed one of the boys and began to drag him off. The friend, and a couple of library patrons who witnessed this, followed behind and the struggle went out to 8th street. It must’ve seemed like roughhousing between boys or something routine because apparently an old man began yelling at the group because he thought they were being “stupid teens”. He was witnessed swinging his cane at the one boy, fighting with him, and calling him “chink” which really must’ve added to the confusion of what was happening. I think I actually know which old guy it was because a few minutes before I checked out a book to him and I remember the cane. He was talking about it to the next guy in line. Apparently the cane was made of bamboo and was special because it was all one piece, including the curved handle. Heating it had made the bamboo pliant enough to be bent and worked into shape. (Who says you don’t learn something new everyday?) I would’ve liked to see this whole scene because this old guy was pretty old and a bit doddering and I wouldn’t have imagined him being very strong on his feet. That must’ve been some wild action out there.
The fight continued and this is where I presume the bad guy with the baseball bat started hitting the kid in the legs as was reported by a coworker.
The bad dudes made their getaway with the boy by going through a nearby yard (someone reported hearing the gate slam) and double backed to the alley where presumably they had a vehicle. By the time I got a chance to poke my head out the back door it was all long over. There were cop cars all over the alley and the dog squad was on the job. The witnesses were being interviewed and the writers from “Without A Trace” were standing by to rip the story from the headlines and dramatize it.
OK, I made that last part up.
So that’s the first kidnapping that we’ve had at the branch as far as I know. As there was another widely publicized kidnapping a month ago on the West side of town, I’ve decided that I’m going to try and figure out just when exactly Vancouver became Mexico City.
One of the weird things was that while all this was going on, nobody seemed to notice. Everyone in the library went about their business, all the people on the street, the workers in the building across the alley, no one really noticed.
Tomorrow, I have the day off so I’ll have to wait until next week for some more material. I’m not sure I could make up an afternoon like that without it seeming fake.
**Post script**
We heard that the young guy who was kidnapped managed to escape and call for help. He was returned to his home by friday night. We haven't heard any more on the issue except that he lost his backpack.
No murders or federal offenses appear to have occurred in the parking lot today. But the week is young. Stay tuned.
It was a regular day, with the usual daily processes, the usual mundane little jobs, and the usual annoying people. One of our old favorites, a lady who has been gone for a long time and goes by the human name of Irene, has recently resurfaced much to our collective chagrin. This is one real specimen of a lady too. Picture a wiry, gaunt faced little troll of a person, with shoulder length brown bristle-pad hair sticking out from below an ever-present baseball cap. She also always wears large brown sunglasses that thankfully hide us from, if the saying is true, her soul. Her first words many years ago upon entering the library and approaching the information desk were: “I’m a New York Jew so don’t fuck with me.” Oddly enough, the Librarian on duty at the time had been expecting a “Hello” or “Good morning.” and was taken slightly aback. Some of her other exceptional moments included the times when she ate the paper checkout receipts (Well, she didn’t actually consume the receipt, rather she just put it in her mouth and chewed on it before spitting it out at us.) and the time she picked fights with almost everyone in the library, staff and customers. The whole neighbourhood knows her and not in a good way. She was banned a few years ago and chose to haunt somewhere else for a while. She’s been seen around for the last year and today she came in and began complaining within 30 seconds of her entrance. Not exactly a record for her but not too shabby either. She immediately set upon a nice lady who was unloading some boxes of books that she was donating to us. First she berated this lady for having the boxes on the floor in what Irene had decided was in the way, and then berated her some more for talking to the librarian and I while unloading the boxes. She then continued to heap the abuse on us for what she said was talking too loud. We all took it for the time being, hoping she would be placated and would shut the hell up. This worked and she stopped and sat down at a nearby table. Then the librarian said “Sorry” to the lady and Irene took offense to this, came over, and started again. “Why are you apologizing for someone else?” She said, and began to insult the woman again for talking while also arguing with the librarian for taking the woman’s side. I decided I had heard more than enough so I took the book truck full of donations and left. Irene retreated for a moment and then came back for another round. As I went into the workroom the librarian and her were going strong. I would like to note that at this point the disturbance she was creating was far louder than anything that was there before she arrived. This is what usually happens with her.
Why is it that people like this never get fatally hit by cars or contract a rare fatal disease? Or even just a common fatal disease? Hell, I’d even accept a small fatal slip in the bathtub…
Anyway, that’s not what I was going to talk about. I’m not even going to talk about the strange native Indian looking transvestite who comes in occasionally and giggles softly to herself while walking around in a glassy-eyed teeth-baring trance. Irene didn’t even notice her and she sat right beside her. What a great corner of the library that was.
What I wanted to share was the other interesting thing that happened. We’ve had incidences before: drunk guys in the library, psycho guys in the library, homeless guys having drinking parties in the back lane, people with road rage fighting it out in the alley, the jewelry store across the alley getting robbed, teens smoking pot outside the back door, etc. etc. But today we had a first since I’ve been around.
About two thirty in the afternoon there was some hubbub outside and I overheard some of my coworkers talking about “calling 911” because there was some kid getting beat up outside by some guys with a baseball bat. I was too busy to find out more at that moment but I got the full story later. Here’s what went down:
Apparently there were a couple of boys around 15-16 years old hanging out in the back parking lot when two bigger guys, wearing black pants, black shirts, black bandanas and black toques (It was pretty warm today so that should have been a bad sign right there.) came around the back corner of the library and approached the boys. One of the guys was carrying a baseball bat and they grabbed one of the boys and began to drag him off. The friend, and a couple of library patrons who witnessed this, followed behind and the struggle went out to 8th street. It must’ve seemed like roughhousing between boys or something routine because apparently an old man began yelling at the group because he thought they were being “stupid teens”. He was witnessed swinging his cane at the one boy, fighting with him, and calling him “chink” which really must’ve added to the confusion of what was happening. I think I actually know which old guy it was because a few minutes before I checked out a book to him and I remember the cane. He was talking about it to the next guy in line. Apparently the cane was made of bamboo and was special because it was all one piece, including the curved handle. Heating it had made the bamboo pliant enough to be bent and worked into shape. (Who says you don’t learn something new everyday?) I would’ve liked to see this whole scene because this old guy was pretty old and a bit doddering and I wouldn’t have imagined him being very strong on his feet. That must’ve been some wild action out there.
The fight continued and this is where I presume the bad guy with the baseball bat started hitting the kid in the legs as was reported by a coworker.
The bad dudes made their getaway with the boy by going through a nearby yard (someone reported hearing the gate slam) and double backed to the alley where presumably they had a vehicle. By the time I got a chance to poke my head out the back door it was all long over. There were cop cars all over the alley and the dog squad was on the job. The witnesses were being interviewed and the writers from “Without A Trace” were standing by to rip the story from the headlines and dramatize it.
OK, I made that last part up.
So that’s the first kidnapping that we’ve had at the branch as far as I know. As there was another widely publicized kidnapping a month ago on the West side of town, I’ve decided that I’m going to try and figure out just when exactly Vancouver became Mexico City.
One of the weird things was that while all this was going on, nobody seemed to notice. Everyone in the library went about their business, all the people on the street, the workers in the building across the alley, no one really noticed.
Tomorrow, I have the day off so I’ll have to wait until next week for some more material. I’m not sure I could make up an afternoon like that without it seeming fake.
**Post script**
We heard that the young guy who was kidnapped managed to escape and call for help. He was returned to his home by friday night. We haven't heard any more on the issue except that he lost his backpack.
No murders or federal offenses appear to have occurred in the parking lot today. But the week is young. Stay tuned.
posted by Biggles at 12:21 AM
1 Comments:
and to think, if you left working at the library, how much source material you would miss.
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