Lines of the year

There were a lot of amusing and annoying moments in the first year of school and I managed to write down some of them. Others are unfortunately lost to the world forever.
Some of the better class discussions and overheard moments:

In Business Communications the teacher asked everyone to say their name and their favorite hobby as a way for him to identify and remember everyone in the class. It went to an asian girl who had an accent.
“Your hobby?” He asked.
“Cok-ain” She replied.
Stunned, the teacher said, “Cocaine?”
The class erupted with laughter.The girl repeated herself “cook-aine”
The teacher got it. “Cooking!"

We were discussing personal reading tastes and styles and had gotten around to the hypothetical question of: what do men read?
Dale says, “What do men read? The bruises on their wife’s back.”

And I realize I could probably fill up an entire list with Dale moments but here was another of the better ones.
I don’t remember what we were discussing and it doesn’t matter because some of my fellow students would go off on random tangents that had nothing to do with anything. Anyway, the exchange went like this:
Dale: “Autos are no good, the drivers are no good, it’s like the Romans and the lead pipes...”
Puzzled looks all around. I look over at Michael and I can tell we’re both curious where he’s going with this.
Dale continued. “My wife used to have a little lead wrench, called it her caressing wrench.”
Michael: “That explains a lot.”
I have to say Michael’s comment was probably my favourite of the year.

In Communications, we were looking at random pictures and talking about what they communicate. Trevor brings up the famous photo of the lone man standing in front of a row of tanks in Tiananmen Square. He asks, “What does this make you feel?”
Stephen, our older English gentleman says something but it’s hard to make out with his accent. It sounds like “re-something”
Trevor, looking a little surprised, responds, “Refreshing??”
To which Stephen quickly says, “No!! Repression! Repression!”

In another class, the teacher, Guy, on the subject of context, asks us all “So, what does a librarian look like?”
Dao-yin, an Asian girl with an accent, hesitantly pipes up with “Buns?”
Guy isn’t sure what she means and says it back to her. “Buns?”
Dao-yin says, “Tight buns.”
Guy says, “Librarians have tight buns?”
Of course we all figure out she means the stereotypical librarian with her hair in a bun, but we take it as a compliment anyway.

And while at the library I overheard two boys, who were around ten years old, talking about someone they knew.
The kid said, “He’s the weirdest guy in the world! He’s even weirder than my dad!”

And what can you say to that except, gee, nice one kid.