"Oh F**k" Moments continued...
Continuing with my pointless list of "Oh F**k" moments in films, I came up with some more. I try not to spend too much time thinking about it but they do pop in there now and again.
5. The Hunt For Red October – Stellan Skarsgard playing Captain Tupolev
- During the climax of the film when the US and Soviet submarines are playing their game of cat and mouse, Sean Connery’s Captain Ramius eludes the torpedoes fired by Captain Tupolev in such a clever way that the torpedoes end up coming around and right at the sub that fired them. Captain Tupolev has long enough not only to realize that he is f**ked but also time for his First Officer to rub it in that he has f**ked them all.
6. Waterworld – The Old Guy playing the Old Guy who lives in the oil tanker
Coming near the end of the movie when Kevin Costner’s Mariner is in a final battle against Dennis Hopper’s Deacon and his giant oil tanker, this “Oh f**k…” moment is one of the funniest. There is an old guy who appears to live in the belly of the tanker, floating about on the oil in a small boat. He is as white as a ghost and pretty unhealthy looking. During the course of the battle an open flame finds its way down through the decks to the oil. As the oil explodes into a massive fireball, this old guy just stands there and watches it coming his way. He says something weakly like “Thank God…” as he is enveloped in the explosion.
7. The Professional – Gary Oldman playing DEA Agent Norman Stansfield
- Near the end of the film, after the long gun battle between the police and Leon in the apartment building, it appears that Leon might just get away. Injured but still alive, he dons a police uniform and makes for the exit. A few feet away from freedom we see Stansfield suddenly appear behind him. Stansfield raises his gun and our hero goes down, shot in the back. As he stands gloating over the dying man, Stansfield has a few last words. Leon, in his final moments, reaches out and grabs Stansfield’s hands. Then he dies. Stansfield looks down at his hands and sees that he is holding a number of small metal rings. He quickly reaches down and rips open Leon’s coat. Much to his horror he sees a number of hand grenades attached to Leon’s torso, and he is holding all of the pins. He realizes he is f**ked and a few seconds later there is a massive explosion to confirm it.
8. The Legend Of Zorro – Rufus Sewell playing Armand.
- The moment occurs near the end of the film when Zorro (Antonio Banderas) and Armand are fighting all over the speeding train that is loaded with Nitroglycerin. (Subtle, huh?) After much back and forth and near misses, Armand ends up on the cowcatcher right at the front of the engine. Both men notice the dead end rapidly approaching and Zorro leaps away. Armand, realizing he can’t get off, knows he is f**ked and heads straight into a fiery explosion at top speed.
And one contribution from my bro Ed, who also enjoys pointless lists.
9. Cutthroat Island – Frank Langella playing Uncle Dawg
- Uncle Dawg, feeling he can finally kill his niece, (Geena Davis) stalks her to the lower decks of the ship. With her cornered and scuttling backwards on the ground he moves in for the final blow. At this moment she pulls back a tarp and reveals a big cannon pointed right at him. Like a deer in headlights he stops and knows he is f**ked. She says a bad pun, sets off the cannon and boom, through the ship he travels.
5. The Hunt For Red October – Stellan Skarsgard playing Captain Tupolev
- During the climax of the film when the US and Soviet submarines are playing their game of cat and mouse, Sean Connery’s Captain Ramius eludes the torpedoes fired by Captain Tupolev in such a clever way that the torpedoes end up coming around and right at the sub that fired them. Captain Tupolev has long enough not only to realize that he is f**ked but also time for his First Officer to rub it in that he has f**ked them all.
6. Waterworld – The Old Guy playing the Old Guy who lives in the oil tanker
Coming near the end of the movie when Kevin Costner’s Mariner is in a final battle against Dennis Hopper’s Deacon and his giant oil tanker, this “Oh f**k…” moment is one of the funniest. There is an old guy who appears to live in the belly of the tanker, floating about on the oil in a small boat. He is as white as a ghost and pretty unhealthy looking. During the course of the battle an open flame finds its way down through the decks to the oil. As the oil explodes into a massive fireball, this old guy just stands there and watches it coming his way. He says something weakly like “Thank God…” as he is enveloped in the explosion.
7. The Professional – Gary Oldman playing DEA Agent Norman Stansfield
- Near the end of the film, after the long gun battle between the police and Leon in the apartment building, it appears that Leon might just get away. Injured but still alive, he dons a police uniform and makes for the exit. A few feet away from freedom we see Stansfield suddenly appear behind him. Stansfield raises his gun and our hero goes down, shot in the back. As he stands gloating over the dying man, Stansfield has a few last words. Leon, in his final moments, reaches out and grabs Stansfield’s hands. Then he dies. Stansfield looks down at his hands and sees that he is holding a number of small metal rings. He quickly reaches down and rips open Leon’s coat. Much to his horror he sees a number of hand grenades attached to Leon’s torso, and he is holding all of the pins. He realizes he is f**ked and a few seconds later there is a massive explosion to confirm it.
8. The Legend Of Zorro – Rufus Sewell playing Armand.
- The moment occurs near the end of the film when Zorro (Antonio Banderas) and Armand are fighting all over the speeding train that is loaded with Nitroglycerin. (Subtle, huh?) After much back and forth and near misses, Armand ends up on the cowcatcher right at the front of the engine. Both men notice the dead end rapidly approaching and Zorro leaps away. Armand, realizing he can’t get off, knows he is f**ked and heads straight into a fiery explosion at top speed.
And one contribution from my bro Ed, who also enjoys pointless lists.
9. Cutthroat Island – Frank Langella playing Uncle Dawg
- Uncle Dawg, feeling he can finally kill his niece, (Geena Davis) stalks her to the lower decks of the ship. With her cornered and scuttling backwards on the ground he moves in for the final blow. At this moment she pulls back a tarp and reveals a big cannon pointed right at him. Like a deer in headlights he stops and knows he is f**ked. She says a bad pun, sets off the cannon and boom, through the ship he travels.
posted by Biggles at 9:20 PM
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